A New Perspective
A New Perspective…
We all need one from time to time. For me, the time is right now. Have you ever been in that kind of head space where you’re grumpy, a little more critical of things than you were before, and just generally blah and negative? For the past couple of weeks, I’ve been there, and trying like hell to get myself back into a more positive space — get myself back to…myself. We’ve all been there, and it doesn’t feel great. The good news is that being in that negative space gives us the opportunity to practice pulling ourselves out, making us mentally stronger and more resilient.
So this week I started thinking about ways to snap myself out of my funk. It’s funny, I think back to my late Grandma Winter saying “if we could only do what we know.” Here I am, and trainer and coach. I’m really REALLY good and helping people snap out of their funks and get back into a positive head space. I’m a firm believer in practicing what I preach, so I started working through some techniques I recommend to my clients, and sure enough, my mood lifted instantly. (Literally, I felt better right away! Sometimes I can forget how effective this stuff really is, and need to experience it myself for a good reminder every now and then.)
I started my day determined to boost my mood and feel great. Here’s how I went about it:
Meditation. Normally I meditate at night before bed. My little guy and I do one together before falling asleep. But this morning I took just 5 minutes when I woke up and meditated before my head got filled with all the craziness of the day.
Eye contact. I resolved to make more eye contact with people, whether in one of my classes or just in general. Making eye contact — especially with strangers — can feel really weird and awkward, but it facilitates connection, and connecting with other people is a great way to lift your mood.
Compliments. Receiving sincere compliments feels great, but you know what feels greater? Giving them. Giving someone a compliment sends your positive energy out into the world. Every action has an equal and opposite reaction, so when you send positive energy out there, it’s going to come back to you. Seeing someone else light up when they receive an unexpected and sincere compliment is an instant mood-lifter.
Exercise. Am I a personal trainer if I don’t recommend or practice this?! Exercise is the most under-utilized anti-depressant, and one of the most important things we can do to feel our best. I was lucky enough to teach a class early this morning, and another one at lunch time. For you, getting the workout in may look like a morning or evening class/training session/personal workout and a nice brisk walk at lunch.
Eat healthy foods and stay hydrated. I will be the first person to tell you I don’t love veggies. They’re yummy enough, but give me mashed potatoes or macaroni and cheese any day and I’m in heaven. However, while I enjoy eating mashed potatoes and macaroni and cheese, I feel better when I’m eating my veggies and sticking with lean protein. Because feeling better is most important to me right now, I’m making an extra effort not to stray from the healthy stuff. And staying hydrated helps keep me from feeling sluggish and slow. Eat for how you want to feel — if you want to feel great, eat things that will make your body feel great and energized. And drink your water!
And most importantly…
PRACTICE GRATITUDE.
When we are stuck in a negative head space, it is so easy to let gratitude fall away, especially if we are going through something hard. Keep a gratitude journal. It doesn’t have to be extensive, but take a moment to write down five things you’re grateful for and why you’re grateful for them. They could be the smallest or most ridiculous things like:
I am grateful that I woke up because I have a lot of things I want to get done today.
I am grateful that the sanitation department picked up my trash because I don’t like having trash around.
I am grateful my son didn’t pee his pants today because I just did a ton of laundry yesterday and don’t really feel like doing more.
I am grateful for the new person in my class because it felt good to help her.
I am grateful to my husband for picking up my son from school because it gives me time to work on blog posts.
Now, you may be going through a really rough time right now and thinking well, that’s all well and good Sarah, but you have no idea what I’m going through. How am I supposed to be grateful when I’m going through this horrible, miserable thing?
Let me tell you how.
Every negative experience we have, whether it’s a minor annoyance or an awful calamity is an opportunity for us to re-frame our interpretation of this experience and turn it around into something that can benefit and serve us. A fight with someone we love can benefit us by making us practice understanding and compassion in the midst of anger and pain. Our kid doing poorly in school can benefit us by opening our eyes to an underlying issue, and helping us learn about resources that can help. Financial struggle can present the opportunity to become more creative and resourceful. Think about what you might be going through, and think about how you can change your thoughts about it so that it goes from being an obstacle to an opportunity.
Growth only happens outside of the comfort zone, which means that in order to experience personal growth, it is necessary to experience discomfort. That discomfort could be anxiety, depression, hurt, anger, heartbreak, jealousy — pretty much any emotion we don’t want to experience. So if you’re going through something hard right now, imagine yourself on the other side of the pain. What will you be like once you have been through this? Mentally tougher? More resilient? More compassionate? More patient? Whatever you’re going through has the opportunity to make you become any of those things, and more.
So friends, if you’re like me and want to get out of negativity and into feeling great, look for opportunities. Embrace the discomfort — be grateful for the discomfort — and let it serve you and help you grow into a better version of yourself. You got this.